In my last entry, I wrote about the beginning of a journey that occurred 24 years ago: my first horse, the child abuse I was secretly enduring, and how my relationship with Peanut blossomed into an unforgettable relationship between a little girl and her horse.
Peanut and I spent many days out and about exploring together and for seven years this horse was not only my best friend, but my savior. He was my rescue, and my hero. I remember saddling him up and taking off with him to get away from my house when the need would arise. He was always ready and willing to take off with me and go explore. Together we discovered some pretty amazing things including: old forgotten cemeteries, old abandoned gold mines, and ghost towns. These days were truly the most incredible days of my life as a child.
Then the economy crumbled and my mother had to give everything up. The night my mother told me over the telephone that she had to move out of our home in Valley Springs and re-home our horses, was a heartbreaking moment. My attitude towards the situation probably wasn’t the most appropriate, but as an adult with children of my own now, I completely understand. I see now how my mother felt. She would rather have our horses re-homed and sent to live with new families than to have too send them off and away into an unknown future.
I have often wondered what happened to my horse. I decided to finally ask her one day about what happened to Peanut and our other horses. She told me she gave our horses back to the people we got them from, so that they could be re-adopted into new families. It was the only thing she could do for them at that point because she could no longer afford to care for them properly.
Shortly after all of this happened, I left California and moved to Florida. Heartbreak after heartbreak seemed to be a common occurrence in my life. Sadly, there was even a suicide attempt at one point. Fortunately, little by little things got better for me. I married my first husband and we started a family together, and life moved on for a bit. Sometime later, I found myself back in California, single and working two full time jobs to support my child. The thought of horses would cross my mind every once in awhile, but I was too busy to really think about much other than supporting myself and my little girl.
In 1996 I got remarried to my best friend and the true love of my life, Richard. Together we have a beautiful family. I have tried very hard to instill my love for animals into all of my children. I’m very grateful to say that they love animals just as much as me, and quite possibly even more.
Spirituality has always fascinated me throughout my life. Those old conversations I used to have with Peanut in the middle of the night, they meant something. I knew I was supposed to remember, and thinking back to these conversations, I have realized they have helped to bring me too where I am at now and have helped to unveil a path before me that is mysterious, magical, and quite beautiful.
In 2009, I began to formulate an idea for a spiritual refuge. This refuge would be run in conjunction with my paranormal research team. The overall plan for this refuge would be to reach out to people who are curious about going upon a spiritual journey of their own. We would introduce people to spiritual theories like art therapy, reiki, hypnosis, spirit investigation, and animal communication.
This refuge would also pave the way for me to be able to delve into many theoretical perspectives. It would help me try to discover the missing puzzle piece about creation, the piece that would get science and religion upon the same page. The piece that will once and for all end this age old argument about how the universe was created and who created it. Is it science and their big bang theory, or is it religion's belief in a supernatural creator? Maybe it’s a combination of both.
I have been working on this for quite awhile and I am proud to announce I have finalized these plans, and I am in the process of opening a sanctuary for horses and animals of all kinds.
My sanctuary will be focusing upon our community as a whole and it will also offer sanctuary for children and adults who have experienced abuse of some kind in their lives. This sanctuary, in a sense, will be helping the abused, care for the abused, and will open a healing journey and a safe space for people and for animals that need rescued from terrible situations.
While on this path I have met some truly wonderful people who are all stepping up to the plate to help me accomplish my goal. I feel it’s truly a sign that I am on the right path. When all matters of synchronicity make themselves known, I can't help but feel that that is a universal sign that your right where you are supposed to be, doing what it is you are supposed to be doing.
There is still more to this story, but if I tried to tell the whole story this would no longer be a blog, but a novel, so please continue to read about my journey as it unfolds. Thank you and have a beautiful week.